Heartbeat X: Rehat as a Transformation for the Beloved

Heartbeat X: Rehat as a Transformation for the Beloved
The caterpillar physically evolves into the butterfly/moth then spiritually evolves into the Flame of Union with the Beloved...

People change their religions, change their diet, change their appearance, change their lifestyles to win over a potential lover. Rehat is no different than this for the person wondering how to win over The Beloved~Guru Sahib. Rehat Maryada is traditionally seen as the code of conduct guiding a Guru's Sikh. On the Path to The Beloved, we never need to ask why we should impress Our Beloved. When someone gives us a tip to bring us closer to The Beloved then we do not delay in implementing it. For every second is difficult to bear in being separated from the Beloved. What can we do now to get closer to the Beloved?! How do we find what the Beloved likes & dislikes? For a Sikh, this includes Our Beloved Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji Maharaj, Sikh history, and the Rehatnamay.
So who do we ask about The Beloved's likes & dislikes? How about those who have won over The Beloved? Those Fortunate Ones are The Saints. In Their Company (literally Saadh Sangat), one betters their own spiritual relationship. It is as if we are seeking relationship advice from someone who has been happily married for many years. For example, they tell us to watch what we eat (as it will have an impact on our mind) and become surrounded by Gurbani in order to meet The Beloved... then *hint-hint* maybe we should listen to them. When a happily married person gives us relationship advice then we would be a fool not to take it.
Let's think about the phrase “being faithful”. Someone who is faithful only thinks of their partner and no one else. Someone who is faithful in a spiritual sense only thinks of the Divine and nothing else. There are a lot like me who are not Faithful who only sometimes think of the Divine. We often look to have the company of those who are Faithful. Those are the Saints.
In their company, one betters their spiritual relationship. It is as if we are seeking relationship advice from someone who has been happily married for 52 years. We may ask how do we know if the person is truly walking on a path of spirituality or not? It is unreasonable to expect that if someone is walking on the Path of Spirituality that they are going to act perfect and are a Saint. However, we can be certain that someone walking on this path has tasted at least a Drop of Immortality that waters the Seed of The Soul waiting to Blossom in True Love. This is the one drop we wish to taste. One person cannot truly judge how much another person loves; Love can only be weighed by our own Hearts. Thus, this Path of Love cannot be confined to objectivity but rather a subjective gradient of Red that becomes so Crimson we lose our train of thought even trying to think about it.
Bhai Nand Lal Ji asks Dhan Dhan Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji Maharaj about the conduct of Their GurSikhs:
ਖਾਲਸਾ ਸੋਇ ਗੁਰਬਾਣੀ ਹਿਤ ਲਾਇ
Khalsaa Soe[i] GurbaaNee Hith Laae[i]
The Khalsa are the Ones who keep & engrain Gurbani in Their Hearts
Bhai Prahlaad Singh's scribed rehatnamay:
ਰਹਿਰਾਸ ਸਮੇ ਗੁਰੂ ਹੁਕਮ ਕੋ, ਪਢਹਿ ਪ੍ਰੀਤ ਸਤ ਭਾਉ
Rahiraas Samae Guroo Hukam Ko, Patdah[i] Preeth Sath Bhaao[u]
This is the command of the Guru, recite Bani with love and faith,
ਪ੍ਰੇਮ ਸਹਿਤ ਰਸਨਾ ਰਟਹਿ, ਪਰਗਟ ਮਿਲਹਿ ਮੁਹਿ ਆਉ । ੩੪ ।
Praem Sahith Rasanaa Ratah[i] Pargat Milah[i] Muh[i] Aaeo
Those who recite it with love, I will come and bless them with my darshan.
(Translation by Bibi Gurprit Kaur [Malaysia])
There are a lot of Rehatnamay & Biographies of Saints which do vary but at least begin by seeing the commonalities & begin implementing what we can in our own life with the thought that it will brings us closer to The Beloved. Not an attempt to emulate but becoming inspired by Blessed Relationships.
Likewise, one person's marriage may progress differently from another's and thus, we should worry about our own marriage before we comment on another's. People will argue about what a good relationship is & why another's relationship is horrible. They do this without actually having a good relationship themselves. Make the loving effort to win over The Beloved... as if all of Gurbani & Sikh Ithihaas is written for our eyes only. Not for our family members or friends, not for our neighbours, not for the world ~ only for us... to wake up to The Love we have been sleeping through. If they ask about our lifestyles then do share or any necessary parts to help them understand our Divine Relationship.
Bhagat Kabeer Ji tells us about what happens if we focus on the Beloved all the time:
ਕਬੀਰ ਤੂੰ ਤੂੰ ਕਰਤਾ ਤੂ ਹੂਆ ਮੁਝ ਮਹਿ ਰਹਾ ਨ ਹੂੰ ॥
Kabeer Thoo[n] Thoo[n] Karthaa Thoo Hooaa Mujh Mah[i] Rahaa na Hoo[n]
By saying You, You! then I became You... there remains nothing of me anymore
ਜਬ ਆਪਾ ਪਰ ਕਾ ਮਿਟਿ ਗਇਆ ਜਤ ਦੇਖਉ ਤਤ ਤੂ ॥੨੦੪॥

Jab Aapaa Par Kaa Mit[i] Gaeiaa Jath Dhaekho[u] Thath Thoo
When the difference between mine and yours is erased then wherever I look is just You!
The Sikh is the physical embodiment of this... look at the sikhs who transformed like the caterpillar to the butterfly... from the mona (hair-cut) into the Physical Form of Dhan Dhan Sri Guru Gobind Singh Sahib Ji Maharaj (5 Kakkars: Kes, Karraa, Kirpaan, Kachhera, Kangha).

Note: Bhai Jagraj Singh is the teenager in the green
Bhai Rama Singh before & after

The self is annihilated and the Beloved only remains. Just like a moth dives to become one with the flame:
ਮਗਨੁ ਭਇਓ ਪ੍ਰਿਅ ਪ੍ਰੇਮ ਸਿਉ ਸੂਧ ਨ ਸਿਮਰਤ ਅੰਗ॥
Magan[u] BhaeiO Pria Praem Sio[u] Soodhh na Simrath A[n]g
Becoming intoxicated in the Beloved's Love, I cannot sense any feeling in my body
ਪ੍ਰਗਟਿ ਭਇਓ ਸਭ ਲੋਅ ਮਹਿ ਨਾਨਕ ਅਧਮ ਪਤੰਗ॥੧੧॥
Pragat[i] BhaeiO Sabh Loa Mah[i] Nanak Adhham Patha[n]g
Now this lowly moth is known all over the world after merging with the Flame/Divine Light
(Chaubole by Dhan Dhan Sri Guru Arjan Dev Sahib Ji, Ang 1363)
When we erase the notion that Rehat is a difficult regiment and instead see it as a lifestyle of loving & attaining our Beloved then it will become very easy to walk on this path. May we encourage each other develop stronger relationships with The Beloved!
Here are some resources with translations of the Rehatnamay:

Our Parent Group